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Funny and sarcastic one liners of Technology

Mar 5, 2020 · He has so many funny moments throug.

From witty one-liners to clever observations about social interactions, these quotes capture the essence of what it means to be an introvert with a sense of humor. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the humor that only introverts can truly appreciate.Oct 10, 2019 · Drives would go a lot straighter if swearing and club throwing helped them go where you wanted the ball to go. ———-. If I hit the ball left, it’s a hook. If I hit the ball right, it’s a slice and when I hit it straight, it’s a miracle. ———-. In golf, the balls lie poorly and the players lie well. ———-.A dog has an owner. A cat has a staff. One liner tags: animal, attitude, rude, sarcastic, work. 80.38 % / 355 votes. share. What's worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing Taxi. …1. "I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it." — Bill Gates. 2. "No man goes before his time—unless the boss leaves early." — Groucho ...225 Sarcastic and Funny Life Quotes to Brighten Your Day; 170 Sarcastic Quotes to Handle Bad Boss; In this article, we'll explore some of the funniest and most relatable funny Friday quotes that are perfect for the workplace, social media status updates, or even messaging your friends and colleagues. ... From sarcastic one-liners to hilarious ...Witty Golf Sayings. "Golf is a game of inches. And the most important are the six inches between your ears.". - Arnold Palmer. "Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course - the distance between your ears.". - Bobby Jones. "Golf is a game where the ball always lies poorly and the player lies well.". - P.G. Wodehouse.is a fun thing to say when someone hands you their baby. One liner tags: food, kids, rude, sarcastic. 81.79 % / 365 votes. share. I hate that feeling after surgery when you're not sure if you're awake or asleep or if you operated on the right patient. One liner tags: doctor, hate, health, sarcastic, work. 48.22 % / 3248 votes.Dirty Pick-Up Lines to Use on Girls Over Text. 76. “Every time you text, it feels like a jolt of electricity to my heart. 77. “Our chat is like a cozy blanket; I'm wrapped up in every word you say.”. 78. “You must be a magician because every message from you is spellbinding.”. 79.The lines below showcase memorable one liners and dialogues from Bollywood movies. One liners in Bollywood Films that are cliché but iconic in every sense. “Maine injection laga diya hai.. Kuch hi der mein hosh aajayega”. “Operation karna hoga.. Dus hazaar rupaiye lagenge.”.No prejudice; I hate everyone equally. Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason. ~Mark Twain. Freedom means the right to yell, “THEATRE!” in a crowded fire. Find more freedom quotes, or …In today’s digital age, funny videos have become a popular form of entertainment for people of all ages. Whether you’re looking to brighten your day or simply unwind after a long d...From the original trilogy to the prequels, Obi-Wan has been known to deliver the occasional funny one-liner. "I Hate It When He Does That." ... Part of the charm of McGregor's take on Obi-Wan is that he plays him with a sarcastic and somewhat sassy sense of humor. It is unexpected but it actually works surprisingly well, especially when facing ...55. Life is about balance. 50% namaste. 50% fuck off. Well, funny people, we hope you enjoyed our collection of 55 inappropriate one-liners that had you laughing until your sides hurt. Before we wrap things up, we want to remind you that if you enjoyed these inappropriate one-liner jokes, you're going to love our range of WTF Notebooks!Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming. One liner tags: animal, health, rude. 94.46 % / 1667 votes. Ham and Eggs: A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig. One liner tags: animal. 94.46 % / 1785 votes. It's funny, when I walk into a spider web I demolish his home and misplace his dinner yet I still feel like the ...Wise Man. Demotivational Posters. Funny Posters. Stock Options. Despair, Inc. - Demotivators®, The World's Best Demotivational Posters. /. May 9, 2012 - This Pin was discovered by Jennifer. Discover (and save!) your own Pins on Pinterest.Funny clean jokes. 1. I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one. 2. I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.Clean One Liner Jokes. 91. People tell me I’m condescending. (Leans in real close) That means I talk down to people. 92. “Proof that we don’t understand death is that we give dead people a pillow.”. — Jerry Seinfeld. 93. I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one.Always identify who to blame in an emergency. One liner tags: attitude, health, motivational. 93.41 % / 1784 votes. share. It's funny, when I walk into a spider web I demolish his home and misplace his dinner yet I still feel like the victim. One liner tags: animal, attitude, life.Body like a Greek statue – completely pale, no arms.”. – Phil Wang. “If God had written the Bible, the first line should have been ‘It’s round.'”. – Eddie Izzard. “I bought ...Are you in need of a good laugh? Look no further. We have compiled a list of the top funny quotes and sayings that are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone. Laughter is truly the b...Sarcastic one liners. My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. He was right—I feel ten years older already. One liner tags: doctor, life, sarcastic. 81.32 % / 504 votes. My husband is on the roof - only a few inches away from an insurance claim that could completely change my life. One liner tags: life, marriage, sarcastic.Then I realized they can handle it themselves. An elderly man goes to the doctor, "It hurts to stand up in the morning." -. The doctor shrugs, "Then don't stand up in the morning." I meet so many assholes at work, it's ridiculous.". -. Stephen, 44, Proctologist. More funny quote jokes.It can't buy you money. ~ Henny Youngman. When I was young I thought money was the most important thing in life; now that I'm old, I know it is. ~ Oscar Wilde. People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made." ~ Joan Rivers.One liner tags: christian, puns. 82.62 % / 3844 votes. share. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. One liner tags: car, christian. 82.56 % / 2770 votes. share. Plan ahead - It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark. One liner tags: christian.One-Liners, Zingers, and Clever Comebacks – PRACTICAL. (Honesty is the best policy) “I’m sober, I’m an alcoholic in recovery.”. “I have a big presentation tomorrow.”. “I’m on a cleanse.”. “Alcohol gives me headaches.”. “I’m picking up my kids later.”. SOBER POP Tips is a collaborative effort to help those new to ...6 6. "GENIUS, BILLIONAIRE, PLAYBOY, PHILANTHROPIST." Many of Tony's most savage one-liners come from The Avengers. This makes sense as this was early on in Tony's journey when he was still at his most immature. This line is one of the most iconic and well-known Iron Man lines from the MCU and is one that many people still quote to this day.One-liners on Love. Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts. Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear. I am someone else when I’m with you, someone more like myself. “Love goes toward love”. ― William Shakespeare. “To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven”. ― Karen Sunde.In today’s digital age, funny videos have become a popular form of entertainment for people of all ages. Whether you’re looking to brighten your day or simply unwind after a long d...By using sarcasm, individuals can vent their frustrations or disappointments while finding solace in their witty remarks. In conclusion, these 20 savage humor and sarcasm quotes have shown us that laughter truly is the best medicine. In a world that can sometimes feel too serious, these quotes offer a much-needed dose of levity and wit.In the fast-paced world of social media, humor has taken on a whole new meaning. With platforms like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, funny jokes have become a staple of online cu...Birthday one liners. I threw a ball for my dog... It's a bit extravagant I know, but it was his birthday and he looks great in a dinner jacket. One liner tags: animal, birthday, puns. 91.43 % / 1762 votes. share. I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B Negative. One liner tags: attitude, birthday, life, puns.In the fast-paced world of social media, humor has taken on a whole new meaning. With platforms like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, funny jokes have become a staple of online cu...Victory Liner is one of the most trusted and popular bus companies in the Philippines, known for its reliable and comfortable transportation services. With the advancement of techn...Sarcastic Quotes That You Can Use as Captions. A psychologist can’t fix stupidity. Apparently, it’s not a disorder that is recognized. Always remember that you’re unique. Same as everyone else. Avoid arguing with fools. At a distance, spectators can’t tell which one is which. Be very careful of humans.Here are some famous one liner jokes that can easily lift your spirits. Most of these cute one liners are from the iconic comedians and others are from random people. I am originally from Indiana. I know what most of you are thinking: Indiana – …Family Reunion Jokes : Funny Jokes, One-Liners, Funny Stories At some point during your reunion, there is going to be a welcome address. Delivering a welcome speech that is both witty and funny can be a challenge for some of us so we thought some popular family reunion jokes, one liners, and funny stories from around the web would help.Thanks for not getting me a lump of coal. ( Funny ways to say "Thanks for the Happy Birthday Wish") Not sure if I should send a thank-you email, or not bother you with another email. I truly appreciate you from from my head to my toes. This isn't a thank-you card, it's a hug with a fold in it. I would floss a tiger's teeth, that's ...Absolutely hillarious kids one-liners! The largest collection of kids one-line jokes in the world. ... sarcastic; school; sex; sport; stupid; success; time; travel; ugly; women; work; Today is Jun 1, 2024 One liner of the day. ... Do you know a funny one liner? Add your one liner to our site and see how good it is. Advertising • Terms of ...May 15, 2024 · Funny One Liners. “Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue. – Dilbert”. “Always remember that you are absolutely unique…. Just like everyone else…”. “As the joker said, if you are good at something why do it for free…”. “Avoid arguments about the toilet seat…use the sink ...These good comebacks, from funny comebacks to sick burns, will help you win any argument. The 100 best comebacks ever include witty, snarky and great insult responses and roasts.Feb 19, 2024 - Explore John Wendt's board "Funny one liners" on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny, funny quotes, bones funny.Funny one liners. Time may be a great healer but it's also a lousy beautician. One liner tags: beauty, life. 93.37 % / 2118 votes. share. It's funny, when I walk into a spider web I demolish his home and misplace his dinner yet I still feel like the victim. One liner tags: animal, attitude, life. 93.25 % / 1967 votes.These funny kid-friendly jokes will make your family laugh on New Year's Eve. Start 2024 with a laugh with these clean, hilarious jokes. Search. Subscribe; ... New Year's One-Liners. Kseniya Starkova. The biggest reason to stay up until midnight on December 31 is to make sure 2023 leaves. Let's choose 35+ funny goodbye one linersI have a hunch, it might be me. One liner tags: attiOne day a man hears that a distant uncle passed away. He&#x

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Funniest and Sarcastic One Liners. June 20, 2011 2 min read Worthview. A small collection of the most funniest and sarcastic one liners on the web. Credits to …60th Birthday Jokes about Aging. Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get up again. You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you. You know you're getting old when you can't walk past a bathroom without thinking, "I may as well pee while I'm here." You know you're old when you turn down the lights to be economical ...31 Quotes About Yourself. Image: Created with Dall.E. "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.". - Oscar Wilde. "People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.". - A.A. Milne. "I am a Queen because I know how to govern myself.". - Lailah Gifty Akita.We've found 85 highly hilarious jokes, puns, one-liners and more, ideal for anyone celebrating another year around the sun. Below, you'll find flat-out funny messages for guys and gals, along with hysterical quotes from famous people, short greetings and even wishes geared for after the fact, if you're running a little late with the birthday ...May 15, 2024 · Funny One Liners. “Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue. – Dilbert”. “Always remember that you are absolutely unique…. Just like everyone else…”. “As the joker said, if you are good at something why do it for free…”. “Avoid arguments about the toilet seat…use the sink ...These one-liners and humorous anecdotes look at office humor from a variety of perspectives, and try to find humor in wry observations, through irony and sarcasm, and even just by being silly. Human beings love to laugh, and being able to notice life's little absurdities can make even bad days seem a bit cheerier.Disney quotes will help you whether you are seeking motivational phrases or a funny one for a chuckle to help you through a challenging day. In the world of Disney, joy and optimism are commonplace. Its cinematic one-liners are among the most effective methods to make you feel better. What To Discuss With Kids; Every Disney movie has a lesson ...Witty Golf Sayings. “Golf is a game of inches. And the most important are the six inches between your ears.”. – Arnold Palmer. “Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course – the distance between your ears.”. – Bobby Jones. “Golf is a game where the ball always lies poorly and the player lies well.”. – P.G. Wodehouse.In the fast-paced world of social media, humor has taken on a whole new meaning. With platforms like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, funny jokes have become a staple of online cu...Sep 29, 2023 · 55. Life is about balance. 50% namaste. 50% fuck off. Well, funny people, we hope you enjoyed our collection of 55 inappropriate one-liners that had you laughing until your sides hurt. Before we wrap things up, we want to remind you that if you enjoyed these inappropriate one-liner jokes, you're going to love our range of WTF Notebooks!12. "True love does not come from finding the perfect person, luckily for you guys." 13. "I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." 14. "May all your ups and downs come only in the bedroom." 15.Sarcastic One-Liners for the Office Drama Queen/King. Drama queens and kings always deserve one punch line; remember you still need an encouraging atmosphere for work. 1. If you get drama to the table; do not be surprised as everyone leaves the table. 2. You are not a happy queen; You are a laughing queen. 3.Frequently, auctioneer one liners are short jokes or witty remarks, commonly referred to as one-liners, to connect with their bidders and create the optimum bidding experience. The key to an auctioneer's chant is communication between themself and the bidders. Clarity is essential and the speed of the chant varies, in large part, due to the ...66. “I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.” -Groucho Marx. 67. “You never realize how truly sarcastic you are until you have a mini-me who acts the same way.” …15. ADVERTISEMENT. A one-liner, also known as a punchline in some cases, is a truly remarkable form of a joke. First of all, it is so short that by telling it, you'll never miss the 'magical moment' and will always leave your audience amused (that is if you've calculated your timing perfectly). Hence, if you are looking for a comedic ...Filthy Funny Sarcastic One Liners is packed with some of the darkest and most memorable one liners I have heard over the last 30 years of military and law enforcement service. If you like dark humor that is likely to get you fired from your job, kicked out of church, or banned from a private property somewhere this is your book. ...A fish swam into a concrete wall, Dam! Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. When life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic. The guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda was lucky it was a soft drink. The man who invented knock-knock jokes should get a no bell prize.1. #23. "At an art gallery, a woman and her ten-year-Sarcastic One Liners - Totally hilarious sarcasti

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Look no further! We have compiled a collection of over 50 cat jokes one-liners that are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone. Whether you're a cat lover or just looking to brighten your day, these jokes will have you laughing out loud. So sit back, relax, and get ready to unleash the laughter with these hilarious feline-inspired jokes!India loves puns and one liners. In the fast paced and heady lifestyle of our country, we don't have time to ponder over the most sophisticated of jokes and all that other elitist bull winkle ...Today, we often use sarcasm not only when somebody or something makes us angry but also when we need to cope with a difficult situation. Read the collection we put together for you, and let us know in the comments what other good jokes with sarcastic undertones you know. #1. "I wish more people were fluent in silence."82.27 % / 337 votes. share. Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards. One liner tags: life, puns. 82.27 % / 3364 votes. share. Moses was leading his people through the desert for 40 years.4. The Serenity of Meditation and Mindfulness: Retirement invites retirees to cultivate inner peace and mindfulness through meditation and contemplative practices. Whether it's practicing yoga, meditation, or tai chi, retirement offers the time and space to nourish the mind, body, and spirit.Sarcastic one liners. People are making end of the world jokes. Like there is no tomorrow. One liner tags: attitude, people, sarcastic. 81.07 % / 386 votes. Told my wife I wanted our kids every other weekend and she reminded me that we're married and live together so I'd have to see them every day. One liner tags: family, kids, sarcastic, time.Then we met. One liner tags: marriage. 82.59 % / 1668 votes. I asked my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug. One liner tags: marriage, mistake, women. 82.48 % / 128 votes. Childs experience: if a mother is laughing at the fathers jokes, it means they have guests. One liner tags: Father's Day, marriage.Welcome to our collection of funny sarcastic quotes that will make you laugh, roll your eyes, and maybe even nod in agreement. These quotes are perfect for those moments when you need a dose of humour to lighten the mood or to add a touch of sarcasm to a conversation. ... Whether you're looking for a witty one-liner or a clever comeback, you ...Get ready to laugh with these funny one liners that will bring a smile to your face. Discover the best collection of witty and clever jokes to share with your friends and family.Birthday one liners. I threw a ball for my dog... It's a bit extravagant I know, but it was his birthday and he looks great in a dinner jacket. One liner tags: animal, birthday, puns. 91.43 % / 1762 votes. share. I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B Negative. One liner tags: attitude, birthday, life, puns.We'll share clever one-liners and quirky expressions that you can use to bring laughter and joy to your interactions. So, get ready to laugh and discover the amusing world of funny affirmative replies that will brighten your day and make people around you giggle. ... Funny Sarcastic Ways to Say Yes. Here are some sarcastic and humorous ways ...1. "The hardest thing in the world is to understand the income tax.". — Albert Einstein. 2. "Today, it takes more brains and effort to make out the income-tax form than it does to make the income" — fictitious character in Mad magazine Alfred E. Neuman. 3.When it comes to brightening up someone’s day or breaking the ice in social situations, a funny joke can work wonders. The internet is a treasure trove of jokes waiting to be disco...High quality Sarcastic Funny One Liners-inspired gifts and merchandise. T-shirts, posters, stickers...If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I'd have a galaxy in my hand. One liner tags: flirty, love. 80.10 % / 1393 votes. share. Love is not the number of times you kissed her, but the number of moments you were dying to kiss her. One liner tags: love. 79.59 % / 247 votes. share. << < 2 3 4 5.These one-liners are bark-out-loud funny! If there's one thing we can all come together and agree upon, it is this: Dogs are the best. They're cuddly, loyal, friendly, and oh so cute — and ...Funny Quote T-Shirts to Win Smiles, funny tshirt quotes, witty sayings on shirts, humorous one-liner tees, sarcastic slogan tops $ 15.55. Add to Favorites Funny Girlfriend Shirt, Unisex garment-dyed heavyweight t-shirt, Gift for Boyfriend, Ex Boyfriend Gift, Shirts that Go hard, one liner shirt ... Indian Movie Dialogue l Bollywood Tshirt l ...I'll be Burger King and you be McDonald's. I'll have it my way, and you'll be lovin' it. 77.71 % / 722 votes. If I freeze, it's not a computer virus. I was just stunned by your beauty. 77.68 % / 898 votes. Page 1 of 17. Absolutely hillarious flirty one-liners! The largest collection of flirty one-line jokes in the world. Jul 12, 2023 · 204 Hilarious Sarcastic Jokes to